Just For You And Your Love
It seems that in 21st century no one has time to sustain their relations. People get married over the internet and get divorced through SMS. Everybody is carrying mobile phones but they do not have time to talk to their family members and loved one. People just do not have enough patience to understand those who care for them and love them. In the midst of all these when I was seeing such devaluation of Human Relations, I happen to meet one of my friend, who is currently based in Singapore, and was delighted to see that even today there are people who value their relations and can do anything to sustain their relations and to be with their loved ones. The story shared in this article is a story of one friend. The purpose of writing this article is to share with the readers the importance of Human Relations and to empathize with those who are forced to stay away from their loved ones.
Background
Our life is nothing but a story. The one sitting above is a story-teller and we are just characters of the story. Our story begins with our birth and ends with our death. All the people that we meet or get connected with for a short-term or a long-term get linked with our story and they also play an important character in the story. Within the voluminous story of our life, there are some sub-stories; story of our success, our family, our friends and our love. Every day in itself is a story that begins and ends.
This is one such sub-story - the story of love. Even in this story there is a beginning, journey, action, drama, fun, romance, emotions but as of now there is no end. I am not sure what will be the end of this story and I am just waiting for the climax to begin. I am also as curious to know the end of this story as you all will be after reading the story.
This story might not be as romantic as the story of Romeo-Juliet or any other love story that you might have heard in your life but this is today's story. This is a really an interesting story. This is the story of you and me.
The beginning
It begins at the time when I was struggling in my life. Doesn't matter how much hard work I was putting in but nothing was going my way. No one was willing to help me in any manner. I was just walking in the journey of my life; there was no excitement, no motivation, no inspiration, and no love. As I am struggling, so there was also no support of family and relatives. In total the life was very boring, purposeless and directionless.
...and then she came into my life. And how she made the entry? Well, she made the entry through one of the greatest invention of our time - the internet or World Wide Web. But hold on the first meeting came with a possible end and I thought the story will end before the beginning it self. Well, we were living in two different countries; we were following two different religions; we were having contrasting careers, that time she was a lecturer in a college and I am a management guy and if that was not enough there was difference in our age and it was a reverse difference as she was elder to me.
On the other side I was not sure what her situation in her life was. What she was going through? What she was looking for in her life? What was she expecting from this relation? What are the problems she is facing in her life? And how she is planning to take this relation to its end? I really didn't know anything.
Anyways, we made the beginning. But what began as an informal professional interaction soon turned into a personal and emotional interaction. We used to interact daily and for several hours and then we also used to wait for each other. After several days our interaction moved out of our computers and carried on to our mobile phones and fixed lines. Days were just flying. Days turned into weeks and weeks into months. There was no day when we didn't have any interaction. I think that was the time we began to miss each other. ...and then she expressed her interest; I proposed and she accepted. But if love stories can be so simple and straight forward then how will they be called as memorable love stories?
Then one day after several months she informed me that she needs to travel to UK to be with her family. I thought this possibly is an end of our story. Once she leaves for another country she will not keep contact and THE END. But nothing like that happened, not only she kept the contact when she reached UK but she also kept me informed through her calls on en route to UK. That gave some strength to our relation and a bit of confidence to me. Our love story carried on for days and months. She used to interact with me as per my convenience and as per my time. She did all the adjustment. Professionally, I was not doing well so it was she who used to call me, initially every alternate day and then everyday.
...and then one day she shared something about her life and about her past and the fact was that she was married for sometime and that she is a divorcee. For a moment I was shocked and sad then I thought that probably she was feeling a bit unsecured to loose me or whatever she is getting in life and that made her to not to share that side of her life; but we carried on and this time with more strength, confidence and love. Several more months passed by and then she told that we should meet now. Financially I was not in a position to travel to UK. She said that she will come to India and she did. In a country where crime rate is so high and anything is possible, she decided to travel to that country to be with her boy-friend, someone whom she has heard and seen in pictures. I think she took the biggest risk.
The journey
...and then the day came when we were standing opposite to each other. That was the moment when we could touch each other and hold each other. It was something that we were waiting for a long time. It was very romantic. Love was in the air.
But, what is this? Where have I landed? I am sure these questions might have passed through her mind. In her life she had been living very comfortable life before she came to meet me. She has all the basic comforts that are required to live a decent and above middle-class life style. TV, refrigerator, air-conditioner, car, washing-machine, well-equipped kitchen and etc and etc; you name it and she had. On the other side, I was not having anything. I was not having anything that I have listed above. Together we moved to a house that was not clean and she took the broomstick to clean the house and later she washed the whole house. In the evening we had to put mat on the floor to sleep. With me she was living a life that she was not used to and she never complained. She did things that in normal circumstances she could not have done but she did. She did for me and for our relation. Later on I did manage to get few things but those were actually not enough. She spent six months with me in those circumstances.
On the other hand, at that point of time I was not as civilized as those people from west are. I was hard, rough, rude and at times even harsh. Like villagers in India, I used to piss anywhere on the road, behind the bush; throw things anywhere in the house; taking bath once in a day...doesn't matter how much it is sweating; cross the road like an animal and I was in possession of many other uncivilized and bad habits. She never complained. Like a trainer and a true lover, she asked me to change those habits and I obliged.
And then when she was about to leave after spending six months with me, I thought that's an end of our story. Once she is out of the country, she will not keep contact and why is she required to keep any contact, she is not getting anything in return of her love and moreover she was not required to undergo so much of hardship. She can easily find many other people and much better than this DESI animal.
Once again, I was wrong. At airport, we cried like small kids for the days of that were lying ahead. We not only kept the relation going but she also came back to India after two months to spend another two months of love, care and togetherness.
After nine months, she again came to India to spend another two months with me. In the process, I moved away from my family and relatives and now I am left with only two things in my life - my love and my profession.
In the mean time, I also began to grow professionally and personally. Now, the life is looking more meaningful, colorful and purposeful. The color in my life is nothing but the color of her love. In the process of my professional growth I did applied for some overseas opportunities and in most unlikely situation, I was able to hold one. I was not able to move to UK but yet it's a good role with plenty of growth opportunity.
Once I moved here, she once again travelled from UK to be with me for six months. Then she moved back to her country and took up an employment in another university. Then, in last year I got an opportunity to visit her in her country and house for the 1st time since we began our relation four years ago.
After reading this far, you must be thinking that now the story is about to end; both of them will get married and then as they say, "they lived happily thereafter". Nothing like that has yet happened; in fact there is a new twist in the story.
Problems, conflicts and related issues
All the while we were trying to know each other, understand each other and become acceptable, which we did to the best of our capabilities. Over the period of time the love between us has grown manifold. There is hardly any day when we do not interact.
...but the permission from parents was still pending. When everything was settling down and our story was looking for an end, she got caught in what appears to be a life long issue. Now, she says that we cannot marry each other. She is facing some personal problems in her family. She is caught in the web of her life in such a way that there is no visible way to come out. That day we cried a lot. She doesn't want to hurt her parents and her family and in turn she is willing to leave me or let me go. I do not want to leave her in the middle of our journey. Together we have come so far that now it is just not possible to live without each other. For others the easiest way would have been to begin again but we are willing to continue in spite of our problems. We tried to find a solution but there was none. And then we decided that...
The future
...and then we decided that for the happiness of our family we will not get married to each other or to anybody else. We will continue to live our life the way we are living now. That is by staying together for 2-3 months in a year till the time she is able to solve her personal problems or we find a long term solution to our problems that is to get a job in a same city. For me and my love she has gone through lots of hardship. Now it is my time to do something for her and our love.
When I was struggling and when I was in problem, she took care of me and now she is saying that it is her life and her problems and I should live her in her situation to face the world. How can I do that? I want to tell her that it is not your life and your life and your problem but our life and our problem so for our life, our future and our love I am willing to do anything. Together we have come so far and together we will reach our destination.
...And it continued
...the story is still pending. It might take us 10, 12, 15 or 20 years or might be life time for us to see the end of this story. At this point of time it is very difficult to say what will be the end of this story but all I can say is that with each passing day, it is becoming more interesting. Now, even I also want to see the end of this story. Till then all I just want to say to her is, (what someone has already written in Hindi),
"tujhe dekh dekh sona
tujhe dekh kar hain jagna
maine yeh zindagani
sang tere bitaani
tujhmein basi hain meri jaan"
(Translation: I always want you to be around me. In the morning when I wake-up I want to see you. In the night when I am about to sleep and my eyes are about to close I want to see you. I always want you to be around me because other then you I cannot see anything; other than your voice I don't want to hear anything. You are my life and everything. I don't know how I will die but I want to live only with you. For you and for your love I am willing to do anything.)
Conclusion
Human Relations are very important for anyone to live in this world. It takes years and decades to build a relation but it takes just few seconds to break it into pieces. All we are required to do is to be patient with our loved ones; understand them and give them space to grow and coexist with us or else they will die.
Save some time to get in touch with your loved ones before it is too late.
With lots of love and care...
Sanjeev Himachali
BLOGS: http://sanjeevhimachali.blogspot.com/ or http://sanjeevhimachali.multiply.com/
E-mail: ss_himachali@yahoo.com - sanjeev.himachali@gmail.com
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Sanjeev Himachali - EzineArticles Expert Author
