How to Get Rid of the Fear of Losing Someone You Love
By Kim Nguyen
Fear can be very toxic to your relationship. Fear tells you to be someone else other than your real self. Fear covers your heart with bruises and fear acts in such a way that disallows any meaningful relationships in your life to flourish.
Before I can help you with getting rid of your fear you need to know how to identify it. The best way is you need to be very aware of your feelings. At the same time, you need to pay attention what your mind is telling you. Please notice that I use the word "mind" and not "heart" because fear only exists in the mind and never in the heart.
Mind is created the minutes you were born. In fact to some sensitive souls mind can be created while you were still a fetus. Most often the fear of losing someone you love created when you were very young and 99 percent of the time it is probably because you were either abandoned by one or both parents.
This mind is also collected all thoughts of anguish and/or sad feelings from your mother who happened to carry you while she was abandoned by her husband or family.
The fear of being abandoned was so great that you will do everything and anything in your power to run away from a loving relationship just because you do not want to be hurt like that again. If you are not aware, you will find that you suffer all the time when you are in love with someone. His/her actions are always the source of constant turmoil for you as you will find that you're always worried if he/she is telling you the truth. You will constantly rob them of any loving moments with you by continually probe them of where they were, what they were doing and with whom.
If you sense any disapproval at all from your lover you will find any and all excuses to run away. Most of the time you will end the relationship or they end it with you out of frustrations.
Here is the single most important tip for you to combat this fear and keep the greatest love of your life.
When that voice in your head starts giving you anxiety about whether or not your lover is telling you the truth, you just simply yell out loud - STOP IT. Do not give it a minute of doubt whether or not this voice is real. It is not real.
Tell that voice in your head that you are the adult in charge and it is only a voice of a child who was abandoned by his/her parents and/or a carbon copy of the mother whose carried it.
I am not trying to tell you to believe your lover at whatever he/she is telling you. But what choice is there? If he/she doesn't want to be with you, he/she will leave. It doesn't serve you any little bit of happiness by continuing to harass them and inject poisons thoughts into their being.
Although when you read to this line and you agree with everything I am saying, please know that this problem is very deep rooted. Your understanding alone will not guarantee 100 percent that you can and will beat it. The mind is very clever and cunning and it will try to take from you what is rightfully yours. You deserve to be happy and in the arms of the person who loves you.
You may want to invest money to get some kind of subconscious workout. Hypnotherapy is one of the excellent ways to deal with this deep psychic wound. There are many books on how to do self hypnosis and I won't go into this here. But for your life long happiness and a life of peace you must act on it.
Kim Nguyen is site moderator for http://yourdatewithsuccess.com For more tips on relationship and dating, visit our website and learn more from others such like yourself.
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